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    Яαgιи Яαvєи
    Cairo, Egypt
    Wanting people to listen, you can't just tap them on the shoulder anymore. You have to hit them with a sledgehammer, and then you'll notice you've got their strict attention.
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Tapping at my chamber door

In 2008, I'll Get Me A Shotgun

I will also:
2. Get closer to
Job hunt some more.
4. Get closer to my
5. Learn a new language.
Finish at least one screenplay.
Lose the extra weight.
8. Get a
driver's license. I will not buy a car.
9. I will
rule my world.
10. I will have my

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Massively Short Intrusion

It’s only when you’ve touched a baby “poop” that you know you’re deeply fucked.

My brother and his wife are both away at KSA until Sunday. They left their one year old baby boy with us. My parents take care of him during the day while I’m at work. I come back home to a little baby that doesn’t know of the harms of the worldly environment. 12 months ago, that baby was swimming in fluids and now he’s gotta deal with shapes, edges, hunger, and verbal communication.

I am proud to say that I can now tell when he’s hungry or thirsty. I can make him cry just by calling his name out at a certain tone. I can make him sleep by reading to him Surat Al fati7a like ten thousand times (Not many parents do that I reckon).

I can now officially add babysitting to my resume.

Even though he annoys the fuck out of me, it only takes one tear to break my heart… and one smile to melt it. I can tell that I’m gonna spoil my kids.

Us men… we don’t do diapers. I didn’t, but I was helping my mother out when a sudden move by the little brat caused my finger to touch the shit, literally.

Should I cut my finger off now?

Dear brother, you owe me BIG!!

-Kol sana wento tayebeen-

awesome post! heheheh I love it... I smiled all along :)

Cheers to you man! Good on you for helping your mom out with the diapers... & dont worry about your finger... soon you'll have your own babies who'll be shitting & puking all over your lap,, your shoulder & Your face...

It's good prep for you now...

cheers & kol sana wenta tayeb

Just for the record, I did not help her our with the diapers.
Don't mess with my anti-diaper policy:P

As for the shitting and the puking.. I think I'll pass.. and pray for a shit/puke loving wife.

wenty bel se7a wel salama ;)

i was smiling too... a bit giggling actually!!

i had that policy too, until i was blessed with my little monkeys :)

i remember crying the first time i had to change my first child, i even remember going hysteric when he peed right in my face.....

but i dare say i have evolved, weeks ago, my son was puking and i kept holding him tighter to help him not panic, and it was a new outfit!!!

so ur policy, it won't hold when u have ur own kids.... even when u let your wife do the dirty work, there will be those times when ur kid drools on u and u won't kill him for it :))))

and about that, why do men stay away from diapers!!!!!!!!!! at least the ones in Egypt, i have an egyptian american friend who helps his wife and does the whole diaper procedure, God bless him!

Two Rules:
1. If my son pees in my face I'd probably donate him to the zoo.

2. New outfit walla la2, if he should puke on me, I'll puke on him in return.

Egyptian American ba2a walla Chinese... I would probably treat my wife as a princess.. but everything has a price. She'll handle the diapers.. I could cheer for her in the background of the baby shit room (yes.. they will be a room designed for that purpose.. and that only.)

Cheers.. w rabbena yekhalleelek weladek. :)

This post is very different from your previous posts. It is not the "Ragin Raven" I got used to. But I like it a lot. It's good for a change.

Well, yes you could add babysitting to your resume! Why not?! Whoever assumed that babysitting was an easy-to-do job that's not worthy of any mention obviously never tried to put a crying baby to sleep or change some nasty diapers. But like you say, it only takes one tear.

In my case, babies are darlings... as long as they don't belong to me ;)


Kick ass post!

Kinda surprising... your blog generally paints a different picture about you.

regarding ur rules.... hahahaha... we'll see, just do't be too ashamed to post about it :p

as for the shit room, it's called a bathroom... for future reference, u can make room for a neet changing table there

let me know when u need designs :)))))

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